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Xenophobe’s Guide to . . . .

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Overheard on a recent flight from Europe to USA:

“It was such a great trip. I just wish they would try to speak English,” she said to her husband. “Considering how much money we gave them after World War II, you’d think they’d show a little more gratitude.”

I had just settled into my seat on the Lufthansa 747 in Frankfurt, heading home to Los Angeles after a busy week of trade shows, hotel visits and a site inspection to Provence. I resisted the urge to spin around in my seat and give her the evil-eye. A few minutes later, I just HAD to turn around to see who had made such an asinine comment. Hmmm. She looked like a nice, educated lady. She didn’t look stupid. Later in the flight, she admired the photographs I was editing on my laptop. We had a pleasant chat. I liked her. I even told her about The WOW! Travel Club and invited her to join my mailing list. Obviously, she doesn’t meet the “code” for inclusion into my Club of extraordinary travelers, but I’m an optimist  – I think she’s trainable. I’m giving her the benefit of the doubt that she didn’t know how ridiculous her comment was.

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A few days after I got home, in my ever-growing stack of “I’m-going-to-read-this-book-one-of-these-days,” a title caught my eye: Xenophobe’s Guide to the Americans. The author, Stephanie Faul, defines xenophobia as: “An irrational fear of foreigners, probably justified, always understandable.” Her series, Xenophobe’s Guides, are “an irreverent look at the beliefs and foibles of nations, almost guaranteed to cure Xenophobia.” There are Xenophobe’s Guides to Aussies, Austrians and Belgians . . . all the way through the alphabet to the Swedes, Swiss and the Welsh. We’re all guilty of gross generalizations and judgement to some extent – it’s a consequence of being part of – and proud of – our country.

Can you guess how foreigners perceive Americans? Here is a sampling:

  • “Even if suburban residents could walk to anything other than the house next door, they wouldn’t. Walking is un-American.”
  • “Winning is central to the American psyche. What is more, Americans believe themselves to be the only nation that is truly capable of winning.”
  • “Once one accepts the Americans’ basically adolescent nature, the rest of their culture falls into place.”
  • “Americans are a forgiving sort and have a short collective memory.”
  • “Starting a religion can be a profitable enterprise, since religious institutions do not pay taxes.”
  • “American parents treat their children with a near-deference unheard of in most European households.”
  • “When they go on holiday, Americans become even more American than usual, if that’s possible.”
  • “The Superbowl is the most important event in the world, probably in the Universe.”
  • “The most typical American restaurants offer no service at all.”

Hmmmm … how many of those ring true for you??

3 Comments

  • Michael Tovee June 14, 2013 at 1:06pm

    Hello Marilyn, Wow! What an interesting topic. One we can all learn from. It bought a smile to me. I’ve lived abroad most of my professional and all of my married life. Countries prior to us arriving in America were expatriate communities and therefore a support system was in place when dealing with the cultures of our host country. 15 years ago, my family and I are sitting on a United Airlines 777 from London to Chicago to start a new life in Minneapolis. I said to my wife it will be nice to live in a culture that we are familiar with and are very much like Americans. Most English believe this. I was so wrong. In some ways we’re worlds apart. Our values and thought processes are different. It took years to settle in. No I would find it just as difficult to back to the UK.

    I’ve had some hysterically funny encounters and some surprises along the way. America is as diverse as Europe is. Each State has a different culture. like individual countries in Europe. My visitors from the UK and Europe have no clue what Americans are like and they know better than I do of course. What we think and in my case thought was. America was like the original Soap Dallas with JR and Sue Ellen. That was the education we received in the UK. The land of plenty. Then Dynasty and Flamingo Road.

    While the ladies comment was rather uneducated it made me think of something I have learnt living here. When natural disasters happen, human rights violations occur, America is at the front of the line with aid and money. Memories are short. It’s forgotten fast and then I hate America starts.

    In my 35 years in the industry most Germans I meet speak better English than the English these days. I’d love to know where she was.

    We should all write a book of our international experiences! I could even make a good comedy series!

    • Marilyn Murphy June 14, 2013 at 2:05pm

      Thanks, Michael. Yes, a great TV concept!

  • Ken June 14, 2013 at 2:41pm

    Marilyn,

    WOW, no pun intended. This same lady was on our recent Air France flight from Paris. I could not restrain myself as well as you did.

    As you know Jeannine and I travel several times a year to France & Italy and we occasionally run into the ugly Americans. Other countries have equally bad mannered travelers as well. After a brief conversation you soon discover they are simply not seasoned travelers. I generally recommend they stay home next time. Traveling is such an experience and a wonderful educational experience you can only learn from by doing. The World is fun of Happy Trails. Take one.

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