The Bubble has Burst | WOW! Travel Small Group Travel

It’s 2:45 AM.

I’m in Costa Rica, attending a travel industry conference. My husband just called. There are brush fires raging close to our home in Thousand Oaks, which – just 24 hours ago – was the scene of yet another mass shooting. Thousand Oaks is historically one of the safest cities in the U.S.

I live in a bubble. The bubble has burst.

It’s surreal to be here in paradise when my home and community is under siege. After the initial panic, I am at peace – knowing that he and Ashley and the cats will be safe. Everything else is just “stuff.”

There are embers from fires to the east which put our home in danger. The fire has already burned many homes in Oak Park, the community where I used to live. This is not a drill. This is really happening.

Scott wanted to know what I needed him to take from our home. We are under mandatory evacuation. Aside from family photos and the cats, my most precious possession is my diary from my trip to SE Asia as a young backpacker. That journey was transformational. The beginning of a magical life.

Because of that travel experience of 40 years ago, I’ve been blessed with opportunity and experiences I never could have dreamed up in my wildest imagination.

I grew up in a depressed, rust-belt town in the midwest, without confidence or a vision for a meaningful future. I was fat, homely and insecure. But I seized an improbable opportunity and took a risk. I got a passport and bought a one-way ticket to Manila (and then I told my parents).

For the next eight months, I traveled (mostly solo) to impoverished places and was astonished to meet people who had nothing, but were so much richer than me. They were spiritual (not religious). They were resilient (not resentful). They were hungry … and yet, happy. How was this possible?

They were curious about me – but not envious of me. How was that possible?

They were so much happier than almost anyone I knew. They taught me so much about the value of life and the joy of living.

My journey as a young backpacker humbled me and emboldened me. I discovered my best friend and my life’s calling.

It’s not a coincidence that I’m sitting here in Costa Rica – a country with a motto of “pura vida” (pure life); a country without an army because they’ve chosen to invest in education and social programs to help their citizens, instead of investing in weapons and war.

I’m sitting here, knowing that my “bubble” back home is suddenly rocked by violence and a natural disaster. More than ever, I feel deep compassion for people in the world who are suffering from violence and natural disasters. But I have insurance. I’ll be okay.

It saddens me to see our country focusing inward and becoming increasingly fearful of “others.” Showing less compassion and tolerance than ever before. How is that possible?

World travel is one way to help Americans understand how blessed we are and how much responsibility we bear to help others around the world.

Over the course of the last 40 years, I’ve accomplished many things I wouldn’t have thought possible. It’s my greatest joy to create travel experiences for others that have, in some small way – changed their lives.

And yet I have two big, unrealized goals:

One is to start a non-profit foundation that would offer travel scholarships to insecure, invisible, young American women. To give them an improbable opportunity like I had. I am passionate about helping women and girls in the developing world – and at home. Feminine energy – nurturing, life-giving, compassionate energy – is vital to the survival of our planet.

The other is a memoir that is “someday” gonna get published.

I was speaking about these unrealized dreams last night to industry colleagues I’ve met at this conference. Just a few hours later, I get a wake-up call from my husband.

I think it’s a sign. Would you agree?

Sitting here in Costa Rica, there’s a water bottle on the table imprinted with: There is no Plan(et) B.

What’s my plan? I want to share my story. I want to write it and speak it. I want to inspire people to travel to unusual and challenging destinations. I want to take them to these wondrous places and provide an opportunity for transformation.

And, in turn, transform the world.

That’s my plan. What’s yours?

Thank you for reading. Do something good for someone today…

41 Comments

natalia November 9, 2018 at 3:49am

Always inspiring to read you!
Warm regards from Barcelona

Natalia
(another konzept)

Melissa E Reiff November 9, 2018 at 6:06am

You truly are super woman! I know you will realize this dream. I look forward to following your progress and the realization of something so wonderful for young women here in the US and throughout the world.
Ani Eustice November 9, 2018 at 8:47am

I had the same plan and in 2018 I published my book. Just do it!
- Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 8:53am
  
  I can’t NOT do it, now that I’ve gone so public with the plan. Lots of people are holding me accountable. It will be done. And – it’ll be a better book because of the growth and learning I’ve done these past few years. Namaste, mm
Suzy Kay November 9, 2018 at 10:34am

Super inspirational! I love love love the idea of your non profit foundation for young women to get exposure to travel! That would have been something that would have been so helpful to me growing up. I would fully support this!
Great blog!
Mary kelly November 9, 2018 at 2:31pm

I am crying reading this . I came from a village in the Philippines with no running water nor electricity. I asked a young Marine to marry me in 1973 right after high school and moving to the big city.
I have been in USA for the past 45 years and have been blessed by wonderful people .
In return, I have been investing in young women to go to school and learn that you can do anything you dream of .
I dreamt of coming to America when I was a young girl .
I don’t know why writing this but I want you to know that Yoi truly inspire me . I lived in Southern California and not very far from you .
Life is so precious..
- Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 2:34pm
  
  Mary – I don’t think I know you … but I would like to meet you. Thank you for reading my blog – and for your kind comments.

Beth Ellis November 9, 2018 at 6:06am

Wow! How right you are and so enjoyed reading this. We do have to figure out how to get our Country back to normal. We were “Great” and now I not sure which direction we have taken. sad. Enjoy your trip and hopefully the journey we take the next few years will all be up hill!

Joey November 9, 2018 at 6:22am

Thank you for writing. Thankful for a mutual friend who shared this. Will keep you and your family in CA in my thoughts and prayers. Heading to Costa Rica next week…

There is no Plan(et) B

Cherryl November 9, 2018 at 7:27am

You are such an inspiration Marilyn and love your joie de vivre. Travel is one of the greatest educators in life. Please take the time to write your book and put me down for a copy

Julie Franz November 9, 2018 at 7:41am

My plan is to cheer you on every step of the way and keep traveling!

Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 7:49am

I love your plan, Julie! Thanks!! 🙂
- Julie Frabz November 9, 2018 at 3:07pm
  
  You’re welcome. You know I mean it! ❤️
  - Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:56am
    
    Love you, Julie!

Rita Connor November 9, 2018 at 7:50am

Marilyn-My heart goes out to you and the residents of Thousand Oaks. I cried so hard yesterday watching the news about the shooting. That was a very thought provoking piece. Thanks for all you are doing. Love, Rita

Elaine Macy November 9, 2018 at 8:24am

Marilyn, I am in exactly the same place and want to talk to you about a non profit you mentioned. I had a similar experience . Lets spend some time and get together.
They just evacuated Malibu.
Prayers and hugs,
Elaine

Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 8:50am

Yes. I’ll call you when I get back in country.

Sherry Purcell November 9, 2018 at 8:26am

Beautifully written, Marilyn. I hold you, your family and neighbors in prayer. The double whammy of fire and a mass shooting are horrific right now. I was glad to read part of your story here in the blog. Can’t wait to read the rest when you publish it. Thanks for sharing.

Marlene Landon November 9, 2018 at 8:39am

So sorry to hear about the fire . We’ll keep you in our prayers. Max and I are in Israel until the 16th and really enjoying seeing all the sights we’ve heard about all of our lives.

Judi Jessen November 9, 2018 at 8:40am

As I lie in bed writing my husbands obituary I see your post. He too valued travel ; not for seeing the glitz but for seeing and knowing and valuing the people as he did in his everyday life as a psychologist and meditation teacher. There is no room for the fire and fury of our country or for other countries as well. We had come so far and we have to get back there, to being great again …before this horrible president.

Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 8:49am

Oh, Judi . . . my heart goes out to you. Thanks for reading and replying – when you’ve got your own sadness to deal with. I never met your husband, but I’m sure he was a wonderful man. He certainly chose well! Hugs and blessings to you, my friend. I know our paths will cross – and look forward to the day we travel together again. Namaste, mm

Jane Halsey November 9, 2018 at 10:27am

What a beautiful from the heart enlightened post Marilyn. I am very much in the inquiry of what next and am trusting that the answer will come. Your idea of the foundation for travel for young women is wonderful and though I do not have great funds to contribute, if I can help in brainstorming or any other way, I would love to contribute that way. Thinking of Scott, Ashley and you as you deal with the fire and whatever it brings. I know you will ask for what you need. Much love,

Kim Hester November 9, 2018 at 10:42am

Yet another thing we have in common! I was in Cabo years ago for my birthday when my sister called. She was babysitting my kids who were little at the time. She said we just got evacuated and your Carlsbad neighborhood is burning to the ground. Luckily our house survived but over 200 homes around us didn’t. Then we moved to Scripps Ranch. Same thing 7 years later almost to the day….347 homes in our neighborhood burned to the ground but we got lucky again. After the first time, I videotaped our house and contents because all the people who lost homes said the biggest challenge with insurance was remembering and itemizing everything they lost. I share your sense of gratitude for dodging the fire and bullets….literally. I also share your feeling that travel gives us empathy for the plight of others as well as a desire to celebrate all of our wonderful differences. Sending good thoughts and prayers to all those in the path of fire and of course to the Thousand Oaks victims of that horrific shooting. May they find comfort in knowing they are not alone and there are still those who want to help another human being in their time of need, no matter who they are or where they are from. We are all on this journey together.

Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 2:38pm

Kim – yes … synchronicity is a wonderful thing. I think of all the people – in Indonesia, Africa, Honduras, Syria, Myanmar …. the list goes on and on of the places which have had horrific incidents of violence and natural disasters. For two such things to hit my little haven within 48 hours is inconceivable. And yet, we are the lucky ones. So grateful.

Debi Dunn November 9, 2018 at 10:45am

Oh my goodness, such a bittersweet blog post! Thanks for sharing and I’m also saddened about all that devastation in California, you are in my thoughts and prayers my friend

Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 2:31pm

Thank you, Debi …. so nice to hear from you. Thanks for reading my blog. I’m flying home in an hour – apparently I will be sleeping in my own bed tonight. So very grateful. The fire burned the hillside just a block away from us.

Andrea November 9, 2018 at 3:15pm

Marilyn, you are my hero always. Your compassion for others and your values are an inspiration. Would love to talk to you about those plans. Glad Scott and kitties are safe. All else is “stuff”.

Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:56am

It’s a date, Andrea. There are many of us with like minds – in and out of our industry – that can be change-makers. Let’s do it!

Maureen Hoyt November 9, 2018 at 3:50pm

This is one that should be submitted to the LA Times with a proposal for the intention to write for them on a regular basis, sharing your beginnings, your middles, and the beginnings of your new endings.

Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:55am

Wow. Okay. This scares the &#it out of me … therefore, I know it’s something I must pursue. Whew … the LA Times??? Me – get published in the LA Times? Really??

Kathryn Jarvis November 10, 2018 at 7:12am

Marilyn, I read this early yesterday morning & could find no words to properly express how I felt about what you were experiencing. Such a sad time for your community. Today I was relieved to learn that the fire spared your home. You have had much to deal with over the past couple years but you met these challenges with strength & grace. Now is definitely your time to start your next goal! A book! Fascinating!

Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:51am

Thank you, Kathy! I appreciate support from everyone and everywhere!!! (And a good kick in the butt if I falter!)

Felice Willat November 10, 2018 at 10:23am

I’ve read your beautifully written blog – yes it is newsworthy – as well as every comment – to feel deeply the pain and inspiration these events bring up – the only way to truly be compassionate and grow to be the best we can be. With each excursion, you shape-shift into the mentor role model you were meant to be. Love you, Marilyn.

Surinder November 10, 2018 at 10:38am

Thank you Marilyn. You are always inspiring! I love the water bottle… where can I purchase it? My son’s school has an Earth Club so I would like to provide some for the kids.

Marilyn November 11, 2018 at 8:14am

Hello, Surinder! It’s been a long time – thank you for reconnecting. The water bottle belonged to a friend – I will find out where she got it. Big hugs to you …. you were always one of my favorite Vistage members!!

Jean Lauterbach November 10, 2018 at 2:04pm

Marilyn, I can’t wait to meet you in a few short weeks. You are an inspiration.

Angela Helgeland November 10, 2018 at 7:23pm

I’m with Kathryn, hard to grasp what’s happening… today, last week, last year. So happy you and yours are safe, sending healing thoughts for all those affected. Indeed a wake up call, we all need to count our blessing and not our differences.

Jack November 12, 2018 at 2:47pm

M, please tell me what I can do to “beat that book out of you”!

Marilyn November 13, 2018 at 6:33am

Thanks, Jack. Fear is a great motivator!

Elaine Dale November 12, 2018 at 5:17pm

Marilyn, it has been quite awhile since we last crossed paths, during which time I know you have been met with major health challenges that you were able to rise above with courage and resolution. That same courage has now been tested again as Thousand Oaks has found itself in the path of the fire, as well as yet another horrific human tragedy with the sensless shootings. Shocking events, both. I was greatly relieved to read your house was spared, but you are still surrounded with the suffering of others not so lucky…and the fires blaze on. Your positive spirit and level headed thinking will no doubt be a source of comfort for those around you as this humbling disaster continues. Your beautiful state is suffering and I pray for an end soon, and relief to come your way. Blessings to you and your loved ones.

Jim Entwistle November 16, 2018 at 8:21am

Marilyn, you are amazing. Your “bubble” didn’t burst just now – you smashed it to pieces years ago and have been forging ahead with your vision ever since. Yes, some of the comfort and safety you have felt in Thousand Oaks has been challenged, but you are a fighter, and will find a way through. I am gladdened to hear that your family is doing well – that’s all that really matters. Be strong! And thanks for your positive and caring approach to all you do. Now, get going on that damn book!

natalia November 9, 2018 at 3:49am

Always inspiring to read you!
Warm regards from Barcelona

Natalia
(another konzept)
- Melissa E Reiff November 9, 2018 at 6:06am
  
  You truly are super woman! I know you will realize this dream. I look forward to following your progress and the realization of something so wonderful for young women here in the US and throughout the world.
- Ani Eustice November 9, 2018 at 8:47am
  
  I had the same plan and in 2018 I published my book. Just do it!
  - Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 8:53am
    
    I can’t NOT do it, now that I’ve gone so public with the plan. Lots of people are holding me accountable. It will be done. And – it’ll be a better book because of the growth and learning I’ve done these past few years. Namaste, mm
- Suzy Kay November 9, 2018 at 10:34am
  
  Super inspirational! I love love love the idea of your non profit foundation for young women to get exposure to travel! That would have been something that would have been so helpful to me growing up. I would fully support this!
  Great blog!
- Mary kelly November 9, 2018 at 2:31pm
  
  I am crying reading this . I came from a village in the Philippines with no running water nor electricity. I asked a young Marine to marry me in 1973 right after high school and moving to the big city.
  I have been in USA for the past 45 years and have been blessed by wonderful people .
  In return, I have been investing in young women to go to school and learn that you can do anything you dream of .
  I dreamt of coming to America when I was a young girl .
  I don’t know why writing this but I want you to know that Yoi truly inspire me . I lived in Southern California and not very far from you .
  Life is so precious..
  - Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 2:34pm
    
    Mary – I don’t think I know you … but I would like to meet you. Thank you for reading my blog – and for your kind comments.
Beth Ellis November 9, 2018 at 6:06am

Wow! How right you are and so enjoyed reading this. We do have to figure out how to get our Country back to normal. We were “Great” and now I not sure which direction we have taken. sad. Enjoy your trip and hopefully the journey we take the next few years will all be up hill!
Joey November 9, 2018 at 6:22am

Thank you for writing. Thankful for a mutual friend who shared this. Will keep you and your family in CA in my thoughts and prayers. Heading to Costa Rica next week…

There is no Plan(et) B
Cherryl November 9, 2018 at 7:27am

You are such an inspiration Marilyn and love your joie de vivre. Travel is one of the greatest educators in life. Please take the time to write your book and put me down for a copy
Julie Franz November 9, 2018 at 7:41am

My plan is to cheer you on every step of the way and keep traveling!
- Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 7:49am
  
  I love your plan, Julie! Thanks!! 🙂
  - Julie Frabz November 9, 2018 at 3:07pm
    
    You’re welcome. You know I mean it! ❤️
    - Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:56am
      
      Love you, Julie!
Rita Connor November 9, 2018 at 7:50am

Marilyn-My heart goes out to you and the residents of Thousand Oaks. I cried so hard yesterday watching the news about the shooting. That was a very thought provoking piece. Thanks for all you are doing. Love, Rita
Elaine Macy November 9, 2018 at 8:24am

Marilyn, I am in exactly the same place and want to talk to you about a non profit you mentioned. I had a similar experience . Lets spend some time and get together.
They just evacuated Malibu.
Prayers and hugs,
Elaine
- Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 8:50am
  
  Yes. I’ll call you when I get back in country.
Sherry Purcell November 9, 2018 at 8:26am

Beautifully written, Marilyn. I hold you, your family and neighbors in prayer. The double whammy of fire and a mass shooting are horrific right now. I was glad to read part of your story here in the blog. Can’t wait to read the rest when you publish it. Thanks for sharing.
Marlene Landon November 9, 2018 at 8:39am

So sorry to hear about the fire . We’ll keep you in our prayers. Max and I are in Israel until the 16th and really enjoying seeing all the sights we’ve heard about all of our lives.
Judi Jessen November 9, 2018 at 8:40am

As I lie in bed writing my husbands obituary I see your post. He too valued travel ; not for seeing the glitz but for seeing and knowing and valuing the people as he did in his everyday life as a psychologist and meditation teacher. There is no room for the fire and fury of our country or for other countries as well. We had come so far and we have to get back there, to being great again …before this horrible president.
- Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 8:49am
  
  Oh, Judi . . . my heart goes out to you. Thanks for reading and replying – when you’ve got your own sadness to deal with. I never met your husband, but I’m sure he was a wonderful man. He certainly chose well! Hugs and blessings to you, my friend. I know our paths will cross – and look forward to the day we travel together again. Namaste, mm
Jane Halsey November 9, 2018 at 10:27am

What a beautiful from the heart enlightened post Marilyn. I am very much in the inquiry of what next and am trusting that the answer will come. Your idea of the foundation for travel for young women is wonderful and though I do not have great funds to contribute, if I can help in brainstorming or any other way, I would love to contribute that way. Thinking of Scott, Ashley and you as you deal with the fire and whatever it brings. I know you will ask for what you need. Much love,
Kim Hester November 9, 2018 at 10:42am

Yet another thing we have in common! I was in Cabo years ago for my birthday when my sister called. She was babysitting my kids who were little at the time. She said we just got evacuated and your Carlsbad neighborhood is burning to the ground. Luckily our house survived but over 200 homes around us didn’t. Then we moved to Scripps Ranch. Same thing 7 years later almost to the day….347 homes in our neighborhood burned to the ground but we got lucky again. After the first time, I videotaped our house and contents because all the people who lost homes said the biggest challenge with insurance was remembering and itemizing everything they lost. I share your sense of gratitude for dodging the fire and bullets….literally. I also share your feeling that travel gives us empathy for the plight of others as well as a desire to celebrate all of our wonderful differences. Sending good thoughts and prayers to all those in the path of fire and of course to the Thousand Oaks victims of that horrific shooting. May they find comfort in knowing they are not alone and there are still those who want to help another human being in their time of need, no matter who they are or where they are from. We are all on this journey together.
- Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 2:38pm
  
  Kim – yes … synchronicity is a wonderful thing. I think of all the people – in Indonesia, Africa, Honduras, Syria, Myanmar …. the list goes on and on of the places which have had horrific incidents of violence and natural disasters. For two such things to hit my little haven within 48 hours is inconceivable. And yet, we are the lucky ones. So grateful.
Debi Dunn November 9, 2018 at 10:45am

Oh my goodness, such a bittersweet blog post! Thanks for sharing and I’m also saddened about all that devastation in California, you are in my thoughts and prayers my friend
- Marilyn November 9, 2018 at 2:31pm
  
  Thank you, Debi …. so nice to hear from you. Thanks for reading my blog. I’m flying home in an hour – apparently I will be sleeping in my own bed tonight. So very grateful. The fire burned the hillside just a block away from us.
Andrea November 9, 2018 at 3:15pm

Marilyn, you are my hero always. Your compassion for others and your values are an inspiration. Would love to talk to you about those plans. Glad Scott and kitties are safe. All else is “stuff”.
- Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:56am
  
  It’s a date, Andrea. There are many of us with like minds – in and out of our industry – that can be change-makers. Let’s do it!
Maureen Hoyt November 9, 2018 at 3:50pm

This is one that should be submitted to the LA Times with a proposal for the intention to write for them on a regular basis, sharing your beginnings, your middles, and the beginnings of your new endings.
- Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:55am
  
  Wow. Okay. This scares the &#it out of me … therefore, I know it’s something I must pursue. Whew … the LA Times??? Me – get published in the LA Times? Really??
Kathryn Jarvis November 10, 2018 at 7:12am

Marilyn, I read this early yesterday morning & could find no words to properly express how I felt about what you were experiencing. Such a sad time for your community. Today I was relieved to learn that the fire spared your home. You have had much to deal with over the past couple years but you met these challenges with strength & grace. Now is definitely your time to start your next goal! A book! Fascinating!
- Marilyn November 10, 2018 at 9:51am
  
  Thank you, Kathy! I appreciate support from everyone and everywhere!!! (And a good kick in the butt if I falter!)
Felice Willat November 10, 2018 at 10:23am

I’ve read your beautifully written blog – yes it is newsworthy – as well as every comment – to feel deeply the pain and inspiration these events bring up – the only way to truly be compassionate and grow to be the best we can be. With each excursion, you shape-shift into the mentor role model you were meant to be. Love you, Marilyn.
Surinder November 10, 2018 at 10:38am

Thank you Marilyn. You are always inspiring! I love the water bottle… where can I purchase it? My son’s school has an Earth Club so I would like to provide some for the kids.
- Marilyn November 11, 2018 at 8:14am
  
  Hello, Surinder! It’s been a long time – thank you for reconnecting. The water bottle belonged to a friend – I will find out where she got it. Big hugs to you …. you were always one of my favorite Vistage members!!
Jean Lauterbach November 10, 2018 at 2:04pm

Marilyn, I can’t wait to meet you in a few short weeks. You are an inspiration.
Angela Helgeland November 10, 2018 at 7:23pm

I’m with Kathryn, hard to grasp what’s happening… today, last week, last year. So happy you and yours are safe, sending healing thoughts for all those affected. Indeed a wake up call, we all need to count our blessing and not our differences.
Jack November 12, 2018 at 2:47pm

M, please tell me what I can do to “beat that book out of you”!
- Marilyn November 13, 2018 at 6:33am
  
  Thanks, Jack. Fear is a great motivator!
Elaine Dale November 12, 2018 at 5:17pm

Marilyn, it has been quite awhile since we last crossed paths, during which time I know you have been met with major health challenges that you were able to rise above with courage and resolution. That same courage has now been tested again as Thousand Oaks has found itself in the path of the fire, as well as yet another horrific human tragedy with the sensless shootings. Shocking events, both. I was greatly relieved to read your house was spared, but you are still surrounded with the suffering of others not so lucky…and the fires blaze on. Your positive spirit and level headed thinking will no doubt be a source of comfort for those around you as this humbling disaster continues. Your beautiful state is suffering and I pray for an end soon, and relief to come your way. Blessings to you and your loved ones.
Jim Entwistle November 16, 2018 at 8:21am

Marilyn, you are amazing. Your “bubble” didn’t burst just now – you smashed it to pieces years ago and have been forging ahead with your vision ever since. Yes, some of the comfort and safety you have felt in Thousand Oaks has been challenged, but you are a fighter, and will find a way through. I am gladdened to hear that your family is doing well – that’s all that really matters. Be strong! And thanks for your positive and caring approach to all you do. Now, get going on that damn book!